At Home in Vermont

Tuesday, March 13, 2007 - computer troubles

I am feeling much better - off the crutches, feeling great. However...... (smiles)....... My computer is not working properly so I am not able to get online much at all. I am hoping and praying I can buy a new computer by the end of summer but it's not looking good! (smiles).

If I am not able to post much, it is because of computer problems. Sorry this is so short. I hope I can write more at another time.

So far I am able to continue with my email magazines - Young Maiden Monthly and Shalom Bayit-peace in the home (quarterly). (I have helpers who have good computers!)

This is probably the only way I can keep in touch for the time being (other than an occasional fluke that I can get online). For more info about these publications, please visit my ministry site at:

http://www.thepuritanlight.com

I really miss writing here and visiting blogs of my favorite friends here!! Hope you are all doing great!

Hugs and love

Mrs. White

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Sunday, February 11, 2007 - Daily struggles in Vermont

Everything had been going well. On the eve of January 11th however, I became very ill. It was unbearable. I was unable to read Scripture to the children and was so disappointed. This sickness lasted almost 2 weeks and it still lingered. Some happy things came out of this. Through some trials, somehow, my husband decided that I no longer needed to work at our store at night. So I have been home completely and totally! What a blessing! This stunned me because I thought of a post I wrote here last year. I said that I wanted to just be home and not mixed among the ungodly and see what came of it (in regard to spiritual quietness, renewal and writing). And now it has come to pass........ All I have to do is our bookkeeping here at home.

I had been feeling very bad physically, cast down and undergoing some pruning. Was I wasting time? I wrote an article, "Called to Die?" And sent it to a magazine for possible publication. If they don't print it, I will post it on my website and share the link here. It has to do with the intensity, in which I feel God is pleading with me to do His work and how much I want to run away from it.........

Joy then came. I was feeling better, accomplishing a lot, and very much at peace...... Then I started noticing problems with my legs. They were not cooperating with me...... Exactly one week ago, I collapsed. Yet I continued to attempt to walk and do what I needed to do, but my body gave out. I had taken a walk across the street to our store with Amy (12) and by the time we started to head back home, she was holding me up with all the strength she could muster. I ended up completely bedridden. My legs would not work. My feet were sore, swollen and "burning." My legs hurt. I rested and just read and Mothered from the couch. The children got out my crutches and I had to use them to get around. (I have had them for about 6 years for times like these). One night, I hobbled over to the stairs leading to Nicole's (17) room to tell her some news. (her room is on the third floor). Then I had to call her to come down. I needed help. I couldn't get back to the couch. My child carried me and carefully laid me down on that couch. .........

Matthew (14), helps me up and down the stairs on the rare occasion I have to do something on my computer (like printing out a payroll check for our employee at the store, etc). I can't make it on my own. I tried using the crutches to go up and down the stairs (there are 15 stairs), but it exhausted me and I feared I would fall.

The children have taken over all the meals and housekeeping. I am losing weight (grins). They don't always cook things I like to eat (gentle smiles).... But they do, tenderly care for me and dutifully provide me with my much loved hot chocolate.

Yesterday was the holy Sabbath. I chose to completely relax on the couch all day, I wouldn't do any bookkeeping for the store. I would just rest all day. This helped. I can feel that I am healing. Today I spent most of the day resting and just now felt very somber and sad and wanted to get my mind off things so I came downstairs (with Matthew's help) and began to write here.

I will be okay.......... All will be well........ Thank you Andrea for caring....... Love and hugs,

Mrs. White

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Wednesday, January 3, 2007 - A Happy Wife

Normally, I have to work in our store for about one hour every night. I take the children with me and the store is across the street from our house, so it is almost like home. Also, my husband is there with us so it is nice. However, nothing is as nice as staying HOME. So Jim has told me that I only have to work 3 nights a week starting today. I am delighted!! He is very good to me.

Do husbands come that way? Well, do they start out as wonderful men? Maybe, maybe not. Most don't. It takes years and years of growing together, of facing trials together; of suffering together and learning to overcome it all. These things strengthen a marriage. How many elderly couples have you seen, who have been married for fifty - plus years? Most, if not all, of them are very happy and considerate of one another. This is because of the passage of time, learning to forgive and learning to really LOVE one another. So no, I don't think husbands always start out good. Come to think of it, neither do we wives......

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Monday, January 1, 2007 - A Quiet Year

I have some goals for the coming year. It is always nice to make a fresh start. Here are some of the things I plan to do:

1. I hope to write one of those annual family updates. This is something I've never done before. It never interested me but since my children are growing up and I've lost touch with several people, I would like to start chronicling our life a bit to share. I would also like to include pictures with this, which would be wonderful.

2. I plan to exercise every single day without fail - regardless of what is going on around me. (Twice a day, once in the morning, and once at night). I have been able to do this for over a week now and I know it won't be a problem. This is for my health, which has been very poor the last year. I don't ever want to get that dragged down again!

3. Get this one.... It is my favorite...... (grins)......... The two youngest children and I are planning to give up tv (movies, etc) for the entire year (with the exception of one day per month). When I first mentioned this to Amy (age 11), she was stunned, then excited. We've had periods of "fasting" from movies (tv) for a month or two here and there, so it won't be so hard. John is perfectly happy about this. He is 9. He is such a good boy! Now we decided to use 12 days out of 365 for "emergencies" or when some really good opportunity comes up for us to see. (Like to watch fireworks on the fourth of July, etc).

4. I plan to re-type a children's novel I wrote several years ago and send it to a publisher. I think I found someone who might be interested in publishing it. It is a humorous book with some serious parts to it. I think it would be fun to have it published.

5. I will finish 2 book projects I have been slowly working on.

6. I will eat healthy and avoid ALL junk food and avoid all soda. This, again, is to improve my failing health. I started this about a week ago, and it is going well. I don't think it will be too difficult. You have to get to a point where you say, "either I stop this, or I am going to be dead." (gentle smiles).

I want a quiet life, here in Vermont. I need quiet to think, study, research and reflect. I want to meditate on Scripture day and night. This, we are promised, will bear good fruit.

What are your plans for the coming year and how will you carry them out?

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Sunday, December 10, 2006 - Late Night Sermons

Many times throughout the day, I listen to sermons on cassette tape. Some are imperfectly recorded and I have trouble hearing them, amidst the childish hum and chatter of my little ones. I will be mixing up a batch of cookies, or peeling potatoes for dinner, while my little cassette player is on and the minister's sermon comes through to warm the household with spiritual goodness! These truths are getting into my children's minds and hearts, so I know it is doing them good.

Alas, often, I can barely hear everything he says. And so, today, I thought I would wait until all are in bed, until all have gone to sleep and I will sit in the dark, by candlelight and listen to the sermons late at night. Just me......... How precious!

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Friday, December 8, 2006 - This is very hard

Vision Forum has extended an offer to their customers. It goes something like this:

If you spend $195 dollars, they'll give you a free DVD set of their History lectures. If you spend $295, they will also give you a copy of the Geneva Bible (which is the same Bible the Pilgrims brought with them when they came to America). Okay, do I have to tell you how MUCH I want these free gifts? I mean, do I have to describe in detail how much I dearly, and truly WANT THEM so much that it is eating at me? I actually thought, maybe there is a way I can come up with such an order? I even went so far as to make a list. This list contained excellent products that would seriously help me and my family and also seriously enrich our home and schooling. I WANT THEM........ But I can't. I am giving this up. It is killing me at the moment, but I am not going to do it. Why? (Read my previous post - "Daddy's Sacrifice."). I simply don't have a single penny to spare......... What I will do, however, is take the printed email offer from Vision Forum, combine it with my list of items I chose and carefully file them away. So, in a sense, I won't forget. In some small way, I will HAVE these items, even if I don't really have them.

****** Later:

I wanted to update this post. With the kind counsel and sympathy of others, I have calmed myself. Just like a writhing child, who is subdued. I found this quote from Martin Luther which is really fitting:

"I have held many things

and have lost them all,

But that which I have

placed in God's hands

I still retain."

I just noticed something else about my post...... Did I say, anywhere at all that I "needed" these things? (gentle smiles).. Our "wants" can often take over our good sense!

Praise His Holy Name - I am over it!

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Wednesday, November 29, 2006 - Daddy's Sacrifice

My husband, Jim, had just worked two double shifts at our store. On Monday, he worked from 4 am until 9 pm (with only a 2 hour break in the middle of the day). He did the same thing on Tuesday. By Wednesday, he was very tired and ready for several hours of sleep. On top of that, he was coming down with a cold and didn't seem to be able to stand up without wobbling a bit. Jim is known to us all as "Daddy." He is my dear husband and the father of our five children. He has an intense work ethic that never ceases to amaze me. He does this to pay our bills and to provide for us all.

We are far from rich. The past few months have been unusually difficult for us, financially speaking. Jim knows I love to spend money and he knows how hard it is for me right now. I cannot spend a dime. The children and I have made a sort of game out of it. On my last birthday, one of the children bought me "season 5" of the Little House on the Prairie series. Unfortunately, our remote control was lost. For some reason, we could only watch the first show on each disc and couldn't watch any of the other ones without a remote. I suffered in silence.... (can you believe this is what I consider a sacrifice for me? - gentle smiles). But you have to understand that my dear husband gladly works so hard to make sure I am happy and content to be at home without worries. He is a treasure. Now the children decided to "scrounge" up some money and buy me a new remote for $7. They were finding all the coins they could. Jim had just gotten home from work and asked what they were doing........ He smiled when they told him.......... He looked so tired. It was Wednesday and he was so worn out........ Just as the children and I were about to head out the front door, Jim called me back. He handed me a $20 bill and said "Here, spend this on yourselves." I almost cried. This was a very special bill because he had been saving it for many years. It had the year he was born on it and he had been keeping it for such a long time. I looked at that bill and just loved him so very much........... It was Daddy's sacrifice........ His wonderful loving-kindness (that we didn't deserve) to his family....... I will always be grateful to him......

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Wednesday, November 29, 2006 - Guests

I find it so sweet that you all leave such kind comments. Thank you for the encouragement and concern. What a blessing you all are!

Helen, you asked if I received your subscription. I haven't yet. Did you mail it? Which magazine was it for?

Love and blessings

Mrs. White

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Friday, November 10, 2006 - Auntie's Couch

20 years ago, my Aunt Pat had this beautiful, elegant couch in her livingroom. I always loved it. I would tug on her sleeve and say "Don't ever get rid of it. But if you do, I want it!" She thought I was crazy. Every so often, perhaps every five years, I would remind her about that couch. "Don't get rid of it, Auntie!" I would plead with her. She really had no intention of getting rid of it, so I felt safe. But just a few weeks ago. She decided to get rid of it. I have been waiting 20 years..........(gentle smiles). It was delivered across 2 state lines to get it to me. It arrived on a Sunday afternoon and was set up on a Monday. I have been sleeping on it ever since. It is still in Mint condition. At first I told the children they were never allowed on it. "This is a family heirloom." I told them. A child would look at me with wide eyes and say, "What if we are sick?" ....... I snapped "then sleep in your bed where you belong!" Then I smiled warmly.

Jim (my husband) came home from work and found Amy sitting on the floor in front of the couch. "Baby?" he asked. "Why don't you sit on the couch, honey?" She glanced at me. She didn't mention the fact that I had forbidden all the children from going near it!

After a few hours, I lightened up...... I let the children enjoy it with me. But I had to put my foot down when it came to eating or drinking on it. They understood. And so for the past few days, Amy and I have been ill and have been sleeping on the couch and watching episode after episode of Little House on the Prairie.

I am feeling a little better today. But when I tried to get on the couch, I actually fell on the floor...... Then I went to check on the laundry. I attempted to open the dryer door, but fell against it instead. "I think I'll go back and lay on Auntie's couch for a bit." I said and cuddled up in a nice blanket and fell asleep. Amy made me a batch of brownies and I am doing much better. No one could understand why I needed the brownies. I tried to explain that brownies were a required food group for me and that is why I had been so ill - a lack of brownies.

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Friday, October 27, 2006 - Helping your Family Love Home

I just came across this article at the Ladies Against Feminism web-site. It is an excellent example of what I was saying here in a recent post. Enjoy!

http://www.ladiesagainstfeminism.com/artman/publish/article_2404.shtml

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Thursday, October 26, 2006 - What Makes Children Love Home?

I have been reading some emails lately about home life. Something has deeply troubled me. Many homes have anger, rebellion and the like. How are these mothers responding? In one case, the mother "rebuked" the "demon" of anger from a teenage child. The child wept. She then threatened the child with severe bodily harm if he ever allowed himself to get into that angry mode again. This seemed to be her normal custom. She had even done this with a four year old child...... (Are you weeping with me now?)............ How can this happen?

Please understand that anger in children, that any sin a child is committing is simply because of his sin-nature. We ALL have one. Mother, guide that child in love. I would sit down with a child, with the love of our Savior, and find out what was wrong. Communicate! Please, lovingly GUIDE your child to the light of heaven and a world of love (As Jonathan Edwards describes in his incredible book). A world of love and forgiveness. That is what home should be. If a child is angry, find out why? Mother, you must realize that you also have a sin nature and must carefully ponder the thoughts of your child to see if there is anything that you need to change.

What makes a child love home? What brings that child comfort? It is the mother's willingness not to be shocked or amazed at the wrong things her child can do. For he is just a babe in Christ! Let him grow in your tender and patient, loving home. Let him feel comforted that when he sins, you will gently talk to him and resolve the issue at hand. (With compassion...... With tears..... with an understanding of sin and the hold it can have on us frail humans.)

I was standing in my kitchen the other day with my (almost) 14 year old son. And he is so handsome. He wears a leather jacket, lifts weights and is so precious. He willingly does Bible studies with me and asks all kinds of wonderful questions. He has a heart of service and generosity.... I was thanking God in my heart that this son loved to chat with me! When he has a problem, he will tell me. When I've done wrong to him (and, believe me, I have without meaning to), he gently tells this to me and we work it out. Then I hug him. I don't yell at him. I do not rebuke him. He is almost an adult. He does not need my lectures. He needs my guidance. And then I tell him how special and wonderful he is. This is called nurturing. Mother, do you nurture your child? If a child is nurtured *also think of nursed - cared for*, he will remember his childhood with fondness and want to always go back there, in his heart. He will later want a home just like his Mamma made for him. This makes children love home...........

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Thursday, October 26, 2006 - TV and Daily life

I gave up on the "spiritual fast" quite some time ago. We had many disruptions. However, I did get exactly what I needed from it....... I felt that I had been depending too much on a little relaxing tv time to get through tough times. And yet, it got to be too much. Have you ever eaten too many cookies and realized it was harming you? It was kind of like that. We stop eating the cookies until we can control our spirit! I've come to realize that TV can be a good tool, but only when used in the right way. If we are surrounded by an ungodly world, perhaps, at times, we might be refreshed by watching an old movie from the 1940's when home life was valued? Or perhaps a movie set in an earlier century where everyone went to church and read the Bible in their homes. I've found these kinds of movies to be "gentle" recreation and they've helped me to just take a break from "life" so I could move on, and get motivated again!

A note to my guests: Thank you so much for your comments. It is so nice to find a note here and there from those of you who have taken the time to visit.

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Saturday, October 7, 2006 - The Old Vermont Homestead

I am sitting here, gathering quotes, files, articles and paperwork to begin the next issue of our women's magazine, Shalom Bayit- peace in the Home. ( A quarterly publication). I am enjoying all the inspiration and blessings I receive just from reading all these lovely meditations. Then I gather up some papers to file and head upstairs. On my way, I see our glass doors and look out onto our front lawn. There, in it's October Splendor, is the essence of Vermont!! The gorgeous colored leaves are breathtaking. The wind blows a few leaves and I watch them land on the ground. You can see, from my doors, an old wooden wagon - something from days gone by, when travelers used one of these instead of a car. Not far from this, you will find two very large pine trees and right near, in the shadow of the sun, you will see our American flag waving in the air, atop a large flag pole. Our 100 year old home, is a large three story colonial on two acres. One would think, looking over at our homestead, that it is a museum.

How blessed am I? To sit here in my beautiful Vermont home as a writer and editor? And in this environment, I am so pleased, delighted and honored to publish magazines for my fellow homemakers who desire peaceful homes..... This is a legacy for us all!

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Friday, September 29, 2006 - Dinner Time

It is raining here in Vermont. I had a pan of lasagna baking in the oven. The children sat at the table with Bibles in their hands. We took turns reading several chapters. When one would lose their place, they'd sneak over to me and I'd point, with the tip of my pen - to where we were supposed to be. Then the child would sneak back to his spot and follow along until it was his turn to read again. One of the older children asked me a question about a verse. What did it mean? I was delighted. I gave an example. The child offered another possible example. And with that, another Scriptural principal was ingrained into that child's heart.

When we finished, I lit the candles and served our dinner. We enjoyed a nice hot meal together. The children giggled a lot. I couldn't help but smile......What a precious, special memory......

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Wednesday, September 27, 2006 - A feeling of Abhorrence

When I started this fast, I almost felt like I was kicking and screaming inside. I had gotten comfortable with watching a movie here and there. I felt settled. But I knew I wasn't accomplishing enough. Can you hear the voice of the Lord, seriously, when you are focused on entertainment to get you through a 'tough day?" Even though it didn't seem like much, and, surely, I wasn't watching the actual television programs, talk shows or what have you. (horrors!!). But even something seemingly innocent had a tendency to take my time away. My mind had been silenced, or pacified, so that I could not think intelligently. Now, just a few days into the fast, I have a feeling of abhorrence for any movie or show! I don't even want a TV set anywhere near me.

I just finished reading a brief biography of the famous Dr. John R. Rice, author and founder of the Sword of the Lord. Oh, what great things for God he has accomplished!!! What an inspiration!! His entire life, every moment, was dedicated to that old saying "What would the Lord have me to do...." And I am shuddering..... Why? Because I feel oppressed and somewhat trapped by my circumstances. How do you live an entirely godly, holy life, when you HAVE to be mingling with the world???? I want to hide out in my house for a time, with my precious family, and focus on that which is heavenly and see what comes of it...... May it be so.........

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Saturday, September 23, 2006 - Progress on the Fast

The first day of my fast from tv was a little hard for me. I had two children in our daycare and couldn't even turn on a Charlie Brown video. It was a long day, but we did okay. It was beautiful outside so we spent quite a bit of time out there. The children were gone by 5:30. However, I was not feeling too well by afternoon and actually became very ill by nightfall. Nicole (17) took very good care of me. She cleaned the kitchen and just sent me to bed. My nerves were a bit shaky. I don't think it had anything to do with the tv, because, personally, I barely watch it. (my one or two black-and-white movies a few times a week isn't that big a deal, right? -smiles). I realized that it was the many homemade cookies I ate and the candy bar. (sigh). I asked Nicole to make me a salad. She did. She is such a good daughter.....

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Thursday, September 21, 2006 - A Spiritual Fast

From time to time, I go on a fast. It is not about food, it is about the soul. I avoid things that are in the world like TV, the local newspaper, etc. It is like going off into a mountain to pray for a time. I read Scripture, Inspiring books, and listen to gospel music and sermons. It is very hard to begin this...... very hard..... It takes every bit of self control to get it started because, Frankly, I really enjoy watching old movies. Today, for instance, I saw one from the 1940's and I just love the way ladies dressed like ladies and acted like them. And the men wore nice clothes and acted like gentleman. But I am going to (sigh) give that all up...... (smiles).... and take some time away to focus on my spiritual well-being. I am going to have some of the children do it with me. But it is hard for them, without some kind of reward. I am quite sure I will think of something! The fact is, I have many writing commitments coming up and I just can't seem to get to them. So this is my motivation. I have to take some time off from real life and just get away to some degree. I can't wait!! It starts tomorrow morning and I will do it for forty days. It will be over on November 1st. This will be hard. I'll keep you posted!!

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Sunday, September 17, 2006 - Something Funny

Have you ever had one of those days where things just weren't going well at home? Well, I happen to have a good sense of humor...... The other night, I had a bottle of soda (cherry coke) and left it on my nightstand all night. The next morning, I put it on the kitchen table and was taking a sip here and there. Guess what happened? After I did a little housework, I went back to take another sip and it exploded all over me!! Imagine how that happened?? One of my children (who was smiling broadly) had shaken it up and just walked right along, not telling anyone. It was very funny and I enjoyed the joke. I laughed and we had a good time with it. Then later in the day, I saw this mug for sale in a magazine. There was a comic on it, of a mother drinking tea. The caption said: "Her children arise up and call her blessed.......I'm still waiting, how about you?"

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Sunday, September 17, 2006 - Young Maiden Monthly

We've just started a new magazine. Our very first issue (Sept. 2006) is now posted on our ministry site.

The publication is called "Young Maiden Monthly" and is geared toward girls ages 12 and up, as well as for Mothers / Daughters and Young Wives.

So far we've received some very good feedback and we are thrilled with the ladies who have agreed to write for us!

Here is the link in case anyone is interesed: http://members.tripod.com/puritan55/id81.htm

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Sunday, September 17, 2006 - Get up and Subdue

I have gotten into a rut. It has not been pleasant. I used to work out every single morning for 30 - 45 minutes. I never missed a day even if I was ill. Then something happened. I fell down the stairs. (a common occurrence for me!)..... So I had to stop and recover. Then I was back to my workouts. But again, something happened. I was in a lot of pain that lasted more than a week and somehow, someway, I had lost my morning routine and I became very tired!! Have you ever felt so tired that you wanted to sleep every spare moment? Nothing else seemed to matter but the basics of life? Not good! Finally I was inspired to just get up and subdue (conquer)!! I realized that I was in control of my life, and everything else (my circumstances, etc) would no longer control me! It was such a wonderful theory! The following morning, I got up an hour earlier, did a little work out and was ready to face the day! It worked so much better. I was not dreading anything because I was wide awake. I hope I can keep this up!

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