Angie's Answer

Thurs. July 17th

Whoa, sorry it has been soooooo long friends.  I have been thinking of things I want to blog/share with you but just have not slowed down to sit in front of the computer and type away.  But you folks are the forgiving kind and so I will begin to catch up on the life of the Rugh Zoo (that's what we loving call our family of 5)

Wacky Wednesdays

Yes, these have continued.  These days just set aside for Mom to invest in her kids has been somewhat of a pressure, trying to come up with something cool that everyone will enjoy.  But God has been faithful each time to give me an idea that ends up fun for all.  On the 9th we had a hard time deciding what to do, and I came to the computer to search Letter Boxing, to which my youngest 2 balked.  I can not tell you how we ended up on the web where we did,  BUT somehow we ended up reading the story of the Red Paper Clip.... this is the guy who in 1998 traded up a red paper clip for a fish pen.  He continued the trading up till he ended up with a house.  Yes, that's right ..... a HOUSE!!  YOu can look it up for yourself if it interest you.  So my kids thought this was fascinating and wanted to try a little trade themselves.  We ended up putting  "One Golden Jester Coin" (plastic 1 1/2 " diameter) on www.swap-it-now.com .  Within the day, no kidding, we had a trade for a CD set titled Hymns 4 Worship.  So now we are trading the CD set with anyone who would like to make a trade.  You can do it through www.swap-it-now.com or you can just comment here.  We have no clue where this may lead but it is fun seeing how this plays out!

Now for yesterday, July 16th we were having an even harder time trying to decide what to do.  I am thinking to myself around noon, why did I start this! More frustration over the "W" thing than any.     See so far we have made it Wet Wed., Wacky Wed., Wood-Working Wed. etc.  To add to the frustration, I had some ideas but they all included a good amount of gas which we all know is not real cheap at this time (probably never will be again!). So, I could come up with nothing.  At last I made a Wild Scavenger Hunt using the alphabet.  THey had 2 hours to find something for every letter in the alphabet.  They started with eating Apple slices, then we headed to the $ store to purchase a Bible. This was the kids idea thinking we could Give it away when we got to the letter G.  As we were purchasing the Bible the cashier commented on my "How can I pray for you?" button.  She said, "Very long".  Of course it took me a few minutes to get her point that she needed lots of prayer.  Well as my kids had planned we returned to the store later to Give the Bible to her.  My oldest felt led to leave her an inspiring note about the Lord's Word inside the Bible just for her.    The day continued on with eating IceCream for I and singing You Are My Sunshine very off key (on purpose) to a friend (the letter S.).  We went begging at a friend's house for something Yummy for the eat, as we ran out of time an needed a Y ..... Yellow cheese was the perfect answer!  Last we got a picture with our young friend, the now famous ZOE!  All in all it turned out to be a memorable day I think. 

School Decisions

There have been no definite decisions made toward school except that we will homeschool all 3 kids this coming year.  THe oldest may go elsewhere for a day or two, or not at all.  Time and Prayer will lead us further into this year with Highschool, Middle school and Elementary school all blended together for the first time (for us that is).

Weight Loss

Now there is a touchy subject!   Oh that this battle were already behind me.  But the only thing behind me at present is the same behind (becinol !   spelling?) I had at the beginning of the year.   I have fallen again in to running to food for....?  Hmmm.  That is where I get stuck.  I am not sure WHY I run to food.  I know it is wrong thinking, but what exactly I am thinking wrongI do not know.  This downward spiral began again when I was getting ready to go to SC to see family at the end of May.  Though I love to be with them, an anxiety about my weight started to build.  Even though I had lost weight, I was thinking that no one would really be able to see it.  WHY is that so important???  I guess because I get big praises when I loose and  a feeling of approval.  WHY is that so important?    Instead of being more strict as I intentioned in the last few days before the trip I began to eat more.  By the time I left SC I had gained 5 lbs and then over the month of June, with very little trips to the gym ( or around the block) I put on another 5 lbs.  Yikes that is almost back where I started from.    AND I did not see it coming.  It is like when you go to California, you can not see on the surface that you are on a fault line.  But in the hotels, there are signs warning you because they know that there is an issue under the ground.  I now know that though things seemed to be going well in my weight loss efforts (though I was constantly frustrated by the slowness of it), I had not completely dealt with the big problems lying beneath.  Otherwise we would not have had this huge break in my control over my eating.

Somehow a friend's comment early this week struck a chord.  I was telling her how I have blown it again and was frustrated with myself.  Her comment was that is why she does not try anymore.  Though I totally understand that feeling of giving up .....it just did not sit well with my spirit.  I thought about it.  Is that what I should do?  Should I just quit trying?  Well first of all that IS what I had done.  I had just stop fighting the fight.  And the result was I was loosing the battle big time!!!  I began to think that I can not give up because deep in my spirit I know the Lord has shown me I will overcome one day.  I will have victory one day.    So on Wednesday morning (before anything Wacky) I forced myself to the gym.  Oh how wonderful!!!!!  I do not know why I let myself put other things before this wonderful experience.  I get so charged when I work out.  I spend the time listening to Christian teachings, praying and praising God.  I leave feeling not only like I am making a difference in my physical being BUT I feel revived in my spirit as well.  I have said it before in my blog, but I feel as if I am breaking through a wall when I am working out and filling my spiritual tank.  No amount of chocolate of food did this for me this past month.  It seems silly again that I let it control me so.  I must let the Lord work out this earthquake

Now I am working through my reasons for getting back on track.  I know in part it is because I know I am going to New Orleans for the Shaklee Convention in less than 3 weeks (Wednesday was exactly 3 weeks).  Because I have eaten foolishly for weeks now, I can not wear the outfits I had planned.  If I am diligent, I can take 10 lbs. off in 3 weeks.  Now .......am I setting myself up again?  I am trying to pray through this.  I know I must lean on the Lord to help me and to keep my focus on the important long term goal.  I need to take care of myself, not IMPRESS others.  One good thing is I feel a peace from the Lord.  I did not fall back into that old lie that God is not pleased with me again.  I know that He is my biggest cheerleader.  Yes He loves me if I am obese, and He loves me enough to want me to be an over comer so that I will not be obese.  He is an awesome, faithful God.  I do not know what the future of this year holds or if I can make it with less falls than in the past.  But I do know that one day, by His grace,  I will overcome this mess. 

And on that note I will end my very long blog today.  Be Blessed, not Stressed.  Angie